Monday, November 07, 2005

Women: Take Back The Night!

The fall season is when, if I remember correctly, whatever feminist groups on campus exist put forth some "Take Back The Night" program and march that attempts to bring to the forefront of society's mind (i) the sexual abuse inflicted on women and (ii) the fact that males are a bunch of predatory, oppressive, and horny louts.

To fight sexual abuse, we should wear all sorts of silly symbolic ribbons, and we should have a candlelight march, and of course we should abort, abort, and abort some more! We can all talk and have a good cry afterwards too. You go, girl!

But there still remains a lot of sexual abuse. [Let's face it --- men are evil, vile, hairy, brutish creatures. My women's studies courses as an undergrad taught me that I'm worthless, an oppressor, only good for the occasional contribution of semen to keep the human race going.] So, apparently, the feminist program isn't working, despite the pretty ribbons and the maudlin sentimentality.

My suggestions for women to take back the night and reclaim their long-lost dignity, PP Politics style:

(1) Let women pack heat. If a woman's "NO" doesn't stop a rapist's or aggressor's power-lust or desire to rape, a bullet [or two or three] will have an anti-aphrodisiac styled effect, methinks. I don't know of anybody who gets turned on even more by being shot, but then again, I'm rather a prude by modern standards, and perhaps I'm several years behind the curve of sexual thrills.

(2) Let women pack heat. Predators might just get the idea that perhaps women can meaningfully fight back against bigger and stronger men. And if they don't get the idea, they can get some hot lead to remind them.

(3) Let women pack heat. Instead of making the majority of women without some sort of martial art training vulnerable and dependent on big government and the police, who despite the best intentions cannot be everywhere, this would be true empowerment.

Now these simple suggestions aren't as symbolic as wearing ribbons and hearing feminist speakers drone on and on about how women are victims and products of an evil impersonal capitalist society. But at the same time, I've never heard of a potential rape victim talking her assailant out of rape by discussing the finer points of oppressor-oppressee relations as filtered through the feminist-Marxist-victimological complex that passes for critical thought these days. Nor is a .357 in a purse as obvious a symbol as walking around with a candle down a street with other candle-totin' feminists and the browbeaten men who go along with that silliness because it makes them feel enlightened and sensitive.

But a .357 or whatever weapon of choice works a lot better than all of the goofy leftist symbolism.

You see, I like solutions that actually work versus solutions that do nothing but make a bunch of pseudointellectual academics in b.s. disciplines feel politically relevant. But that's just me.

*******Pedantic Protestant Poll!!*******

Question #1: you're a woman, and you have strong evidence to think some guy is going to physically assault you and possibly rape you. What would you rather have to survive such an encounter:


Question #2: You're a woman living alone, and some guy is pounding your door. He sounds like he's high, drunk, whatever. He's threatening to kill you, and he seems to mean business. What do you do? [Choose one]

(a) Tell him that you're empowered and you've "found yourself" as a person by watching Oprah and taking Ecofeminist Hermeneutical Socioeconomic Principles down at your local university's open-to-the-public "learning annex."

(b) Affirm your "right to choose" and lament the latest nomination for SCOTUS.

(c) Tell him that you're going to call the police, and, ask him to wait 6-10 minutes for them to arrive before he tries anything drastic. [You'll ask him in a really nice voice.]

(d) Let him in. Perhaps he'll watch Lifetime or the Oxygen Channel with you and co-gorge with you on that two-gallon container of "Vanilla Chocolate Brownie Swirl," taking his mind off the violence due to the sensitive programming on those enlightening channels.

(e) Lock-'n'-Load with your good friend

and assert your right to protect yourself against threats to your person and property.

We'll post the correct answers to this quiz later if nobody gets it correct.


Blogger Progressive Christian said...

I have thoroughly exposed the hatemongering and intolerance in this post at my

You might feel educated after reading it, if you can read.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005 4:01:00 PM  

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